Loving children (part three)

This was published on Mothers Day about a fortnight ago

 In my last instalment of Loving children, I honour my second mother Teddy Busingye Bangirana, for all the love and care she took in raising me and my eleven siblings. As children she fed us on a balanced diet, bathed us three times a day, arrayed us in clean cloths and tucked us in for noontime naps. We lived in Kabale then, and being a very cold place in

With my second mother Teddy Busingye

the mornings and evenings, we always had running noses! And she would envelop our noses with her mouth and use her tender tongue to mop us thoroughly clean! I can never forget that motherly act. She also led us on our knees in prayer nightly. Prayer has remained a potent force in my life. 

It is when both or either of the parents is actively involved in the lives of children that they grow up with emotional stability that helps them to navigate the challenges of adulthood. Psychologists say a child knows almost as soon as it is a few hours old whether or not it is loved. A child who feels consciously or subconsciously rejected often grows up as a 'problem child'; doing crazy things and seeking love in the wrong places, through wrong means.

"Inside every child is an emotional tank waiting to be filled with love," says child psychologist Dr. Ross Campbell. "When a child really feels loved, he will develop normally, but when the love tank is empty, the child will misbehave. Much of the misbehaviour of children is motivated by cravings of an empty love tank."

 Loving children is more about bonding; playing and laughing with them, helping out as they do homework, teaching them to pray, tucking them in bed, anything that brings deeper connection. It is when children sense that they are understood, loved and wanted that they grow up with inner security that helps them to become responsible and productive citizens. 

Happy Mother's Day to Teddy Busingye Bangirana, and to all the mothers doing the best they can.