Shaken forward, not backward

A young man told me recently that his life has lost meaning. "Everyone at home looks at me as misfit," he said. "I feel like a burden to them. I've even contemplated committing suicide." 

As he poured out his heart, I saw the fear in his eyes and read the hurts and frustrations in his facial expressions like a page in a novel. His problems started with drinking alcohol. He was unable to complete his law degree because of an addiction to the bitter stuff.  

Everyone wants to be the pride of their family

 He was taken to several rehabilitation centres. But as soon as he was out, he would still find his bottle. In all this, the family could not stop telling him what a shame he had become. This was a great mistake. Every individual wants to be the pride of his family and friends. The fact that he came to talk to me says as much. But in hurling his failures at him, the family was pushing him deeper into the bottle.

This young man just needs to be understood and helped with steadfast patience.  His family could look at his strengths and use them to affirm him. For example he's a lover of rap music, and is very eloquent with a strong, clear voice that can get him a job on one of the radio stations. 

As we talked, I could see a bright future for the young man. He should not be judged quickly. Don't forget: failures are not permanent. It takes very little for struggling individuals to pick themselves up and begin to lead valuable lives. 

I encourage you too to prove your critics wrong by turning your tests into testimonies. The trials of life often come to give us a chance to reinvent ourselves. As Bishop Festo Kivengere once said, let the challenges of life be "springboards from which to jump forward, not deterrents to stop us from moving."