The Valentines Day buzz on social
media got me thinking about love and marriage. We are living in an age of
desperation. Young women are desperate to hook up rich young men and get them
to commit. But these young men are not interested in committing. They are busy
chasing after bucks to sustain the glitzy lifestyle, and enjoying all the
sweetest taboos associated with it.
When a woman catches their fancy,
they splash the cash with wild abandon, but after a couple of romps move
on to the next fine woman in town. Thus character is no longer part of the
equation. Money is now the only factor. If you have lots of it, most women will
come running without bothering to even look at the condition of your heart.
These are the women who say they would rather cry in a Benz than laugh on
a bicycle!
So the hard-working,
noble-intentioned, God-fearing young man who would make a fantastic husband and
father is rarely given a second glance. The 'liberated' woman of today has
convinced herself that this man is boring and a poor love-maker. She wants the
tattooed, dread-locked "bad boy" with mighty muscles, an accent
and a sports car. He makes butterflies fly in her tummy when he says "Hi,
baby" in his arrogant way. It is after years of being used and discarded
by these money men that she starts praying, ironically, for the
good man to settle down with; the type she had rejected.
Unless these women open their
eyes, they shall remain "beautiful but unlucky" i.e. have plenty of men to sleep with but non to marry them. It's no longer the looks but the light on the inside
out that hooks--the light of maturity of character. Even that rich bad boy wants a wife who can cook a good
meal and prides in taking care of her man. No man wants to marry a material
girl.
Part II
After Valentines Day,
a friend of mine came with a story of how the girl he had hopes of
marrying had shattered his cosy dreams. First she told him the place
he had taken her out to was below her standards. And that the gift
he bought her was cheap.
His narrative reminded me of an
interesting article by Lee Grady that warned men against girls with"dollar signs in their eyes"; girls who only love men
that indulge their extravagant tastes. My friend's date certainly has
"dollar signs in her eyes". That's why she could
not appreciate his thoughtfulness. She is the type who sees
nothing good in a man except the contents of his wallet.
That she told him point-blank that she wasn't
impressed also revealed her puffed-up ego that makes her think she's of a
higher class than her pursuer could afford. Marrying her would be trouble
unless she learns the hard way like the heroine of Guy de Maupassant's famous
short story, The Necklace, who loses a borrowed necklace and works
10 hard years to pay for it! That was enough to strip Madame Loisel of her
obsession with fancy stuff.
Just because you are
more beautiful than the Queen of Sheba does not mean you can wrap a
man around your bitty little finger and drag him to wherever
you want. A woman who is impossible to please will destroy
your destiny if you cling on. When Jay Gatsby, the hero of my favorite
novel, clings to Daisy Buchanan, he is destroyed. When a
man lets go, the right woman will show up and so love you that
you will even marvel what you had seen in the other girl. Just live your
life, man, never let a woman's beauty hold you at ransom.
