Matilda's Christmas complex

Around December many years ago, I used to go with other curious boys to watch rehearsals for Christmas carols. We would sit at the back of the church and watch hypnotised as the choir went through all the popular carols.

Their leader, Matilda, was a lovely woman with a motherly figure and a belly laugh. Everyone loved her. What a big melodious voice she had, and how passionate she was about the things of God! 

Makerere Full Gospel Church choir

My father always said Christmas was the time to give, and would give us money to buy gifts for the people we liked. I bought Matilda a gift, and waited with longing to deliver it on Christmas day immediately after the carols. 

But that Christmas, Matilda didn't show up. We were shocked, for it was unheard of for her to miss church, let alone Christmas. What had happened? Who was going to lead the choir into carols? 

After a little more waiting, the carols began without Matilda. It later turned out that the tailor had not finished making her new dress, and Matilda decided to stay away because she felt it would be too embarrassing for her to attend Christmas without putting on something new. 

It's flabbergasting how many people today suffer from Matilda's Christmas complex. Christmas pegged on things is cosmetic Christmas and makes us miss the true meaning. It's not the merry hoopla that surrounds the day but the hearts with which we live that matters. 

The story of Jesus who and whose birth we celebrate demonstrates that love in its quintessential form is priceless. No one is rich enough to afford the kind of love that sent Him on the cross to die for the sins of mankind. His birth and death therefore hold more meaning when we walk the love He showed; being kind one to another consistently and savouring the joy that comes from being that considerate, than waiting for one December day and returning to our selfish living the day after.

Merry Christmas.

A vital thing

The will to win is important but the will to prepare is vital." I read that off the wall of the Lugogo MTN arena, and said selah! How beautiful, how true.

Practice makes perfect

It's that time of the year when we look back at the resolutions we made in January, and evaluate our performance. Some punch walls on realising they have done little, others repent, promising to do better the following year.

But here's the thing: everyone desires to win. God wired us that way. We're inherently competitive. Yet the person who stands out at the end of the day is the one who goes beyond the will to win by rolling his sleeves and doing the requisite preparation. 

Preparation is what the greatest boxer of all time, Muhammad Ali, was talking about when he said "The fight is won or lost far away from the witnesses, behind the lines, in the gym, and out there on the road; long before I dance under those lights." 

Opportunities for success are always available and beckoning but only those who are prepared will seize them with aplomb and execute them like geniuses because of their readiness.

Preparation begins with the realisation of the preciousness of time. There are only 24 hours, 1440 minutes and 86400 seconds in a day and the person succeeds who uses his time wisely. It's amazing the order and focus that comes into someone's life when time, including time to play, is planned for.

Preparation also means feeding well: three square meals of balanced diet a day, exercising for fitness and having enough rest (doctors recommend 6-8 hours of uninterrupted sleep) so you can rise revitalised to handle the tasks of a new day.

Go read about the lives of very successful people and you will learn more about preparation as the most vital ingredient behind every great achievement. Then you won't be asking why your resolutions never get fulfilled.

You will get there

It's a common narrative in Uganda. A bright and gifted young man leaves university with great expectations. He's excited to find work in a field he's passionate about, even if he's taken on as an intern with little or no pay at all.

From 8am to 5pm he works, putting a smile on the face of his employer. The capabilities of the young man are evident but for years he works like a horse without the benefits of a full-staff member. He moonlights to make ends meet but nothing seems to change for the better. The boss keeps saying he doesn't know what he would do without you but never backs his words up with action to qualify his appreciation as genuine. 

I started out as a journalist. Now I run my own company.

 Now your family is losing patience. They begin calling you unserious, unambitious, unassertive and uncreative. You don't drive, don't own a plot of land, have no wife. In their estimation you're a total failure compared to most people you went to school with. 

Well, this piece goes out to you. Take a moment to reflect, you will realise that all the struggles you have endured have instead of destroying you actually made you a better person. They have taught you perseverance and given you strength of character that will carry you through other challenges of life.

As long as you have a plan, goal, mission, never write yourself off.  As some people get busy underestimating you, ignore then and get busy learning and planning, praying and growing in wisdom. Without realising it, you will win the war against mental strongholds; all those ugly labels slapped on you will not trip you, rather they will serve as the little irritations that Ambassador Boney Katatumba said are an invitation for us to grow in wisdom, understanding and wealth.

Keep practicing honesty and hardwork even when the financial returns seem but a pittance. Rather than fight back in the same manner as those unfairly treating you, make your small steady moves to your destiny. One day you will get there and there will be no turning back.

A fight for control

Self-employment is not for the faint of heart. That's why many people prefer to stay in formal employment instead of doing something about their long-cherished dreams of stepping out and running their own show. It's not because they lack the resources; often they have all it takes but the underlying fear of failing numbs them from letting go of the security of a reliable monthly salary and related perks.

Use your expertise to lay down your terms

Those who bravely step out of the boat and tread on the waters are immediately confronted by strong waves and must quickly learn to swim against the tide lest they sink before their vision bears any fruits. That's the way it is—that at the centre of every enterprise are two contending forces: the good and the bad. The good is rare in the marketplace, and the evil force is always pulling all the stops to subjugate and control the good to stop them from making headway in the industry and become independent. They want to stay in control of them.

 

The evil force may be that tech guy you pay to fix your computer but never really does. He tinkers with it and makes you believe he has done a fantastic job, but two days later you will be calling him to 'fix' it again. It may also be the big man who brings you projects and gets rich at your expense; never paying you on time, or always paying you in small installments with colourful promises of how the next project will pay bigger and better. These are two examples of tricks used to make you a victim of dependency syndrome whereby you find yourself under the control of another person even if you’re self-employed. 

The contending forces will always be there: one doing everything to outwit and control the other. But know who you are and what you have, and use it to lay down terms those who need your expertise should respect, or have no business dealing with them again.